High-Conflict Couples and Families

Specialized therapy to interrupt destructive patterns and rebuild connection and collaboration in relationships.

Understanding High Conflict Relationships

Move from Conflict to Connection

When conflict becomes the norm rather than the exception, relationships can feel exhausting, hopeless, and destructive. Chronic arguing, communication breakdowns, and cycles of hurt can leave everyone feeling stuck and alone. At Summit Psychotherapy Center, we specialize in treating high-conflict couples and families using evidence-based approaches. Dr. Jasmine Dobbs-Marsh, who directs Stanford’s DBT Couples and Family Program, leads our relationship therapy services. We understand what drives relationship conflict at a deeper level—the patterns, triggers, and vulnerabilities beneath the surface. Our specialized approach helps couples and families understand their stuck points, interrupt destructive patterns, build emotion regulation skills, and rebuild empathy, connection, and collaboration.

What Makes a Relationship “High Conflict”?

Understanding the Patterns

High-conflict relationships are characterized by chronic, intense conflict that feels impossible to resolve. These aren’t occasional disagreements—they’re repeated patterns where the same issues keep resurfacing, conversations escalate quickly, and resolution feels impossible.
Common Patterns in High Conflict Relationships include:
Frequent, intense arguments that escalate rapidly
Communication that breaks down or becomes hurtful
Feeling like you’re walking on eggshells
Cycles of pursuit and withdrawal
Difficulty repairing after conflict
Feeling misunderstood or invalidated
Emotional dysregulation during disagreements
Trust issues and patterns of betrayal
Impact of trauma on relationship dynamics
Parent-child conflict and family tension
Arguments that happen frequently and feel tricky to resolve

Signs Your Relationship Needs Help

Is Your Relationship High Conflict?

You may benefit from specialized relationship therapy if you’re experiencing:
Arguments that happen frequently and feel tricky to resolve
Escalation from small issues to major conflicts
Feeling emotionally exhausted by the relationship
Communication that shuts down or becomes hurtful
One or both partners threatening to leave
Children being affected by parental conflict
Inability to discuss certain topics without fighting
Loss of emotional connection or intimacy
Resentment building over time
Trauma history affecting relationship dynamics
Difficulty understanding each other’s perspective
Feeling hopeless about the relationship improving
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Specialized
Treatment Approaches

Specialized
Evidence-Based Relationship Therapy

Our team uses specialized approaches designed specifically for high-conflict relationships:

Dialectical Behavior Therapy for Couples (DBT-C)

Skills-based approach from Stanford’s DBT program

Dialectical Behavior Therapy for Families (DBT-F)

Family systems intervention for emotion regulation

Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT)

Attachment-based approach to rebuild emotional bonds

Trauma-Informed Couples Therapy

Addressing how past trauma impacts current relationships

Structural Family Therapy

Understanding and changing family interaction patterns

Communication Skills Training

Learning to listen, validate, and express needs effectively

Emotion Regulation for Relationships

Managing intense emotions during conflict

Repair and Reconnection Strategies

Building back trust and intimacy

What to Expect in Treatment

Your Path from Conflict to Connection

Understanding the System

We start by understanding each person’s perspective, relationship history, and what drives conflict. We work to create safety, assess the multifaceted causes of conflict, interrupt shame and blame, and create opportunities for each person to become a part of the solution.

Identifying Patterns

Together, we identify the stuck points—the patterns that keep you trapped in conflict and what each person can do to get unstuck. Understanding what’s driving the cycle is the first step toward change.

Building Skills

You’ll learn practical skills for managing emotions during conflict, communicating effectively, validating each other, and repairing ruptures. These aren’t just talked about – they’re practiced in session.

Rebuilding Connection

As destructive patterns decrease, we focus on rebuilding empathy, trust, and emotional connection. The goal isn’t just to fight less – it’s to feel closer, more understood, and more collaborative.
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Why Choose Summit for Relationship Therapy?

Stanford-Level Expertise in High Conflict Relationships

Our team, led by Dr. Jasmine Dobbs-Marsh, brings exceptional expertise in treating high-conflict relationship systems. Dr. Dobbs-Marsh directs the DBT Couples and Family Program at Stanford University and is a founding member of Stanford’s DBT Trauma Services Team. She specializes in helping family systems understand what drives relationship challenges and how to rebuild connection. Our approach integrates DBT’s focus on validation and change, trauma-informed understanding of how past wounds affect current relationships, and evidence-based couples and family therapy approaches. Our psychotherapy in Redwood City, CA goes beyond the individual — we understand relationship systems and how each person contributes to both challenges and solutions.

Ready to Transform Your Relationship?

Conflict and disconnection don’t have to be your reality. Our specialized team can help you interrupt destructive patterns, build new skills, and create the collaborative, connected relationship you deserve.
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